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Hey friends,
Before we dive into the deep end, a few quick items of note.
First, I want to warmly welcome the hundreds of good people who care about fighting fascism and who have signed up in recent days. For everyone here on this journey, thank you. Your support inspires me, and I hope to do the same for you.
Second, there are dozens of daily news stories I would consider important enough to report on, and I’d love to bring each one to your attention, but I certainly cannot cover them all. As always, I will do my best to prioritize the most urgent, underreported, and consequential ones.
Lastly, things are always in flux—the weather, public opinion, our political landscape, and the layout of this newsletter. I’ve experimented with different formats to balance information density and readability. With that in mind, I am testing out a more minimalist format—stripping away unnecessary distractions to provide a better reading experience. I hope you find it more enjoyable to read.
Now, let’s see what fresh hell awaits us today…
Hitler would be so proud
Trump signed an executive order declaring that “only the president or the attorney general can speak for the United States when stating an opinion as to what the law is.” In other words, “Hey America, fuck your laws and your checks and balances. Oh, and I just sat on my gold-plated toilet and wiped my fat ass with your precious Constitution. What’re you gonna do about it?”
Source: AP
Medicaid on the chopping block, Trump holds the axe
Trump wants his Republican bootlickers to swiftly pass a budget resolution so he can give those tax cuts to his wealthy donors. House Republicans came up with their bill, which includes cutting $880 billion from Medicaid—effectively gutting assistance for millions of vulnerable, low-income Americans. Senate Republicans have their own version of a bill which, reportedly, does not include deep Medicaid cuts. Despite repeated promises that he would not touch Medicaid, guess which of the two proposals Trump is reportedly leaning toward?
Source: The Hill
If you’re homeless, for your own safety, get the fuck outta D.C.
Donald Trump wants the federal government to “take over the governance” of Washington D.C. because he has world leaders coming to town to visit him, and he says there are too many tents and too much graffiti, so they need to “take care of the homeless” because “we can’t have that in Washington D.C.” It’s horrifying to think what he means by “take care of the homeless” because he sure as hell doesn’t mean addressing their needs and finding them adequate housing.
Source: The Hill
Trump copies Hitler yet again
In 1944, Hitler’s regime launched Aktion Gitter, a mass-arrest operation targeting political dissidents, opposition figures, and former officials deemed threats to his rule.
Now, Trump is following a similar playbook, appointing U.S. Attorney Ed Martin—D.C.’s top federal prosecutor—to lead Operation Whirlwind, a crackdown on Democratic lawmakers under the guise of investigating “threats” against public officials.
Martin has already set his sights on Rep. Robert Garcia (D-California) and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-New York), and it’s only a matter of time before Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-New York) is next. Trump’s border czar, Tom Homan, recently called for an investigation into AOC for sharing information that could help immigrants understand their rights—an excuse tailor-made for this regime’s brand of political persecution.
Source: WaPo
How many billionaires in our government are we up to now?
Two more Trump nominees were confirmed today: billionaire and insider trading aficionado Kelly Loeffler to lead the Small Business Administration and billionaire Howard Lutnick for Secretary of Commerce.
It’s interesting to note that one of the companies Lutnick ran was busted for a host of crimes, including money laundering and aiding and abetting an illegal gambling business.
Loeffler and her husband, who happens to be chairman of the New York Stock Exchange, received a private Senate briefing on COVID-19 just as the pandemic hit. The two dumped millions in stocks right before the market crashed and then invested in companies that stood to financially benefit from the pandemic.
But I’m sure these two assholes will do great jobs (ripping off Americans.)
Dead Kennedys > Living Kennedys
… Apropos of nothing, one of my favorite bands as a teenager was San Francisco’s own punk legends Dead Kennedys—a far better choice than newly-minted HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr., who yesterday addressed those poor souls who are now under his bozo leadership.
Kennedy asked them to “let go” of any preconceived notions of him (sure, buddy) and went on to promise "radical transparency,” which, translated from MAGA to English, means “extreme opaque secrecy.” Additionally, he outlined plans to “review” long-established policies and standards (which are just fine as they are, thank you very much,) indicating renewed scrutiny of everything from childhood vaccination schedules to tried-and-tested medications used to successfully treat ADHD and depression.
The man who, when he talks, sounds like a goat being fucked in the ass with a vibrator, parroted Dear Leader’s edict, declaring that public health agencies will recognize only “male” and “female” as “sex-based definitions.” Kennedy bleated on, “This administration is bringing back common sense and restoring biological truth to the federal government. The prior administration’s policy of trying to engineer gender ideology into every aspect of public life is over.”
Last week I wrote that Donald Trump wants us to die, the proof of which is appointing this psychopath to oversee the mothership of federal health agencies. Appointing Kennedy to lead on the nation’s health makes as much sense as putting a flat-earther in charge of NASA, only this will have far more dire consequences for any American with a pulse. Americans with no pulse should be just fine.
From luxury hotel to jungle detention camp—what next?
Nearly 300 migrants deported from the U.S. were flown to Panama and locked up in what could only be described as a luxury hotel. Strange? Yes. But perhaps the cruelty of what comes next makes more sense. Around 170 of them volunteered to be repatriated to their home countries through a UN program. The remaining detainees have been transferred from the hotel to a primitive Panamanian jungle detention camp called San Vicente, where they face dire conditions and limited access to aid. The latest word was that their phones had been confiscated, and their last communication was a plea for help.
Source: NYT
FDA rebrands as Fucking Death Administration
As if Kennedy leading HHS isn’t bad enough, let’s talk about how Flop Sweat Führer fired nearly 100 FDA experts, and now, in a move that says, “Fuck it,” deputy commissioner Jim Jones has resigned too.
Did we really need infant formula safety experts or professionals in charge of food safety response to alert us about recalls? I mean, what’s the worst that could happen? We could get sick and die? Pfft. Hold my raw milk.
The FDA didn't immediately respond to requests for comment. For some reason, they were in the bathroom puking their guts out.
Source: WSJ
They lied to us about DOGE—shocking!
According to the White House, Elon Musk is not the head of DOGE. Those of us who thought he was leading the federal wrecking ball of a fake department were apparently mistaken. I’m not sure where we even got the idea he was in charge, except maybe from all those times Trump, his White House, every media outlet on the planet, and Musk himself said so.
According to a White House official’s declaration filed in the District Court of Washington D.C., Temu Nikola Tesla works as a “senior adviser to the president” and “is not an employee of the U.S. DOGE Service.” One of Trump’s most evil ghouls, Stephen Miller, stated that Trump himself is head of DOGE.
So, quick thought experiment—this means that Musk, a senior adviser to the president, has been systematically going through every federal agency, gutting funds, firing workers, and stealing data, but nobody is burning the government down over this? To compare apples to apples, can you imagine if Barack Obama had given David Alexrod carte blanche to waltz into the Treasury and every other government agency, covertly infiltrating their payment systems and stealing confidential information? There would be no Republicans left in Washington D.C. because all of their fucking heads would have exploded.
Source: Daily Beast
Donald Trump: serial predator—of women and nations
Subhuman ghouls Trump and Putin are fucking Ukraine over in unimaginable ways. As it turns out, Ukraine’s exclusion from peace talks would prove to be the least of their worries. Zelensky is in a losing position no matter what happens, pinned between continued, intensified military aggression from Putin or complete economic shakedown by Trump, which also doesn’t guarantee Ukraine’s sovereignty. If economic aggression is, by default, less horrid than military aggression, Trump made his economic demands so great as to match the severity of military assault. Essentially, no matter what, Ukraine is fucked.
Today, Moscow’s most useful idiot tweeted a barrage of lies—that Zelensky talked the U.S. into giving him $350 billion to go to war, that Ukraine started the war, that Zelensky told Trump that half the money we’ve sent them is missing, called Zelensky a dictator (hello? pot? kettle?) that Zelensky just wants the “gravy train” to keep going, that he’s done a horrible job, etc.
The lie that Ukraine started the war is a Putin talking point.
Also worth noting that Adolf Hitler spread the lie that Poland invaded Germany rather than the other way around. Aren’t all of these similarities between original Hitler and orange Hitler interesting? Trump is selling out both the United States and Ukraine to Russia.
I hope at some point Zelensky decides he’s had enough and publicly tells Trump to go fuck himself.
Source: NPR
And there you have it—another day where billionaires roast marshmallows over the open flames of this roaring dumpster fire we call America.
We’d all do well to keep in mind the words of the great civil rights leader Frederick Douglass who said…
“Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”
Just remember that even in this embarrassing clown show of a country run by criminals, traitors, thieves, rapists, racists, grifters, drug addicts, drunks, idiots, and assholes, that giving up is never an option—because the only thing worse than fighting this battle is letting the bastards think they've won.
Fuck that.
Sincerely unhinged,
Chris Zappa
